Just keep walking

There are the pretty days of winter, when the snow falls so gently and covers the earth with a beautiful blanket of snow. There are the adventurous days of winter where we bundle up in our coats, hats, gloves, scarves, and boots in order to find enjoyment on.a snow-covered hill with a sled in tow. There are the cozy days of winter when it's too cold to venture out anywhere, so we make a hot drink, curl up with a blanket, and sit by a hot fire to stay warm. There are the hopeful days of winter when we've been cooped up for days, and then we see the sun shine and begin to melt all the snow. 

But then there are the dreary, foggy days that have nothing to brag about other than a damp cold that nobody wants to be out in, and nothing but gray, foggy skies to cloud our vision for what is ahead. The lack of color and sunshine can dampen anyone's normal cheerful mood, and the lack of clarity can bring a real sense of gloom. 

Not much to take a picture of on a day like today, but I took the picture anyway. And I still put my walking shoes on, bundled up with an extra layer, zipped up my rain jacket, and tied my hood over my head to block the cool breeze from blowing in my ears. 

Seasons are like that. There are days when we can find beauty to appreciate, see the silver lining, or figure out a way to make the best of things. There are days when we give ourselves a break and allow our minds and bodies to get some much needed rest and relaxation while we wait for brighter days ahead. There are days we smile with relief when we start to see the light at the end of the tunnel and our hearts stir with renewed enthusiasm. But there are also those cold, damp, dreary days that can threaten to steal our joy and just make the future look bleak, foggy at best. 

Those are days that are much more emotionally unbearable than physically. It's not too cold to get outside. In fact, we don't even need all that much extra gear to bundle up in. Perhaps an extra layer, a pair of gloves, a rain jacket, and something to cover our head. We're not going to freeze (or sweat), nor are we going to get drenched in any kind of downpour. They are the days we need to just "pull up our pants", zip up our jackets, and push ourselves through. Through the mundane, the clouds, the fog, the depression, the lack of clarity, etc.

Be present, don't give up, and just keep walking. Every step counts. Every step matters. The fog will eventually lift so we can see the road ahead more clearly. If we didn't have gray days like today, we wouldn't know how to fully appreciate the sunshine when it does come back around. 

Why winter?

It's the middle of January, and we're not quite into the middle of winter yet. But the temperatures have been in the single digits recently (it's currently 1 degree outside where I live), and we woke up to a beautiful blanket of about two inches or so of snow.  This week in school we've made fake snow and did snow themed art. When my students arrive today after an hour delay, we'll be writing about snow days and reading/reciting poems about a white wonderland. I've got the fireplace going with calm jazz music in the background. I've got my cup of coffee sitting beside me, and all that's missing is a comfy chair, a blanket, and a good book to curl up with and read. 

These temps have had me thinking about the season of winter lately and why God added snow and freezing temperatures into the cycle of seasons He created. It's really cold, uncomfortable, requires a whole different wardrobe, it gets dark so early in the evening, and our activities are severely limited at times. 

Winter seems to be a lot of work (especially when you want to heat your home naturally with a wood stove constantly full of firewood and a hot fire inside.) It takes longer to get dressed if you need to go outside for anything. Any activity requires much more effort than in other seasons of the year. It's harder to go out for a walk and breathe in the nature all around me when my nose and fingers need to thaw out after just a few minutes outside. 

But could it be that God's original design for winter was not to add extra work but extra rest? Could it be that we're supposed to take advantage of the longer days of sunlight and warmer temps to do the extra work in the spring and summer so we're prepared to stay inside during the winter? Could it be that we're supposed to give way to the "lack of life" (loss of leaves) and to strip ourselves bare of all the extra activity (like the bare trees and flowerless fields) and let our minds, bodies, and souls recover from the busy months, trusting that a new, fresh season full of life and vitality will follow this one in due time?

Like a Sabbath day meant for rest and reconnection/trust in God's provision, perhaps the cold winter months are God's original design for our rest, recovery, and trust in Him for all that's yet to come. 

I think finding a good book sounds like the perfect investment of time for the weekend ahead. 

 

A friend for every season

My sweet friends from LakePointe Church Firewheel

These friends here, and many others not pictured, became so much dearer through the season of COVID separation.

These are the friends I dug into Scripture with before, during, and after COVID. The friends that met together on Wednesday evenings for women's Bible study, on Saturday evenings (or Sunday mornings) for church and Life Group, on Zoom for Bible study, or on my front porch to talk about Biblical friendship and to pray for, encourage and fellowship with each other.

I cherished those friendships and that time together talking about Scripture and our growth in our relationship with Christ before that spring and summer of forced separation and isolation, and we were determined to find ways to trudge through it and stick together. We continued to stay in the Word and find ways to encourage and pray for each other through those hard months. We still found safe ways to gather and grow together. But when the doors opened back up for us to congregate together again, those relationships felt even dearer, stronger, and more meaningful. We no longer took our coffee dates or Bible study groups for granted. They meant and mean so much more now. 

They're friends for any season, really. Each one in this picture is special to me in a unique way. But all together they represent an essential part of life. They represent a priceless relationship and friendship that can only be found among sisters-in-Christ. A provision that design that God always meant for us to have and to lean on throughout our lives. A gift that is always available if we just take the time to look for it. 

I miss this particular circle of friends in the picture, but I love that they represent my new growing circle of more sisters-in-Christ that I've now met and developed similar friendships with here in Columbus, Indiana. Whether near or far, each one of these friends fulfills a huge need and void in our lives for the season that they're there, just as God designed. 

Friends from New Song Mission

Friends from Texas that loved on my son when he got hurt

A friend who goes deep

A friend from a marriage group

That friend who always finds you the right shirt

Friends from my new church Community Group

A friend from Colombia who knows my whole Colombian story and saw me through it

A new friend in Indiana

New Counseling Partners friendships

Church friends in Texas that go way back

New friends in Indiana at a women's weekend gathering

New fellow adoptive mom friend

A new friend with an instant connection

Friends from camp at New Song Mission

A Discipleship group friend

Best place in town to make new friends at a women's night out at Terrace Lake Church

Friends from New Song Mission

Friends from a church Community Group outting

The dearest of friends and fellow teachers

A friend that will always be family

Not pictured: All the friends that aren't quickly accessible in pics on my phone. 

Moral of the story: 

Friends (especially sister-in-Christ-friends) are essential through every season of life. Never take a true friend for granted or miss an opportunity to connect--especially over a hot drink, where the most meaningful conversations take place. 

 

A season of teenagers

Sometimes God sends us friends in such unsuspecting ways. My friendship with Amy is a prime example of that.

David started middle school right after we adopted Juan, and he jumped right into the youth group at church and all of the mission opportunities it offered. He happened to get to know a special girl on those first few mission trips who he ended up dating through most of high school. That sweet relationship opened up just as sweet of a friendship between her mom and me. A friendship that accompanied us through our young teenagers years of dating, through a season of high school, through a season of teaching second graders, through a season of our kids going on mission trips, and then a season of college. Though our kids eventually stopped dating each other, they still went to youth group together, went on all the same church trips, went to the same high school, and then attended the same college. These shared experiences between our kids gave Amy and me a lot in common, but we also taught the same grade in the same district, attending many of the same trainings together. It seemed the more we talked and went out for coffee together, we found out more and more things we had in common. 

We joked around with our kids in the beginning of our friendship that we were besties just to mess with them. But over time, that's exactly what we became. We've laughed together, played together, dined together, hung out as families together, rode Sky Screamers and roller coasters together, gone on day trips together, studied the Bible together, gone to church together, prayed together, cried together, and shared a lot of deep conversation over coffee together. We held each other up through some pretty hard stuff, and I couldn't ask for a better friend over the last several seasons into the present, raising our kids together from the end of middle school till almost the end of college already. 

 

More than just a soccer season friend

Meet my beautiful friend, Mara.

Mara and I met on a bench on a soccer field when our sons were about four or five years old, I think. She's from Guatemala, and her husband is from Nicaragua, and I was one of only a few white moms from the soccer team. I sat quietly on the bleachers, and we now make it a joke that I was listening in to their conversations in Spanish almost like a spy because they had no idea I knew Spanish. Honestly, we talked very little until we happened to run into each other while visiting a new campus at church close to both of our homes. We all went out to eat together after the service, and then continued going out to eat almost every week, talking late into the afternoons. We connected deeply, our boys hit it off and became wonderful friends, as did our husbands. Our long Sunday lunches out many times turned into all day gatherings as we continued fellowshipping over coffee and games in one of our homes. They walked closely with us through our entire first adoption process, and she even talked to Laura on the phone once! When we finally adopted Juan, then we both had two children the same age, so the connection multiplied. 

We cheered our hearts out at the soccer fields as we watched our little boys grow up together. We walked together, shopped together, played games together, watched our husbands co-coach the boys' soccer team together, went to church together, studied the Bible together, and most importantly, we drank coffee together. I say most importantly because, well, some of the deepest and most vulnerable conversations happen over a cup of coffee (or a mug with a hot drink). In addition to all the fun moments we shared together, we stood by each other through some pretty dark times of loss in both of our lives and prayed each other through. 

She's the friend that stands out in all my soccer Mom memories, but she was/is/will always be so much more than just a fellow soccer Mom friend. I'm eternally grateful to know her and still meet up for coffee when I'm in town. 

 

Friends for a season

While walking outside and talking with God through different seasons, I love to see how God planned every season for a purpose and also how He provides everything needed for each one. He prepares the animals with everything they need for the specific environment they live in, and they survive in community. I rarely see wild animals alone around here, with the exception of a turtle crossing the road. The birds flock together. flying from one tree to the next, and the deer run around in herds together. When I spot one deer in my yard, I can usually look toward the woods and find several others. When one starts to run away, the whole herd runs away together in the same direction.

God also provides us with community and sends us certain friends for certain seasons. Some friends come and go, while others remain friends for life. But each one represents a season that they accompanied me through that I will always remember.

I'm in a new season right now, in a new place with new friends that God specifically placed me with for a purpose. But I recently had the opportunity to fly back "home" to reconnect with some of those friends that represent past seasons of my life. I'm going to feature a different friend for each of my next few posts to focus on the specific season or seasons of my life that they walked with me. I'm so thankful for the way we will always love one another deeply and for the way we can just pick right up where we left off. These are the kind of friends everyone needs in their life.

To start, I'd like to introduce you to my dear friend, Mori, and the seasons that God put her in my life for.

Mori quickly became my first friend when I moved to Texas. My sister-in-law met her at a neighborhood ice cream social and found out she owned a bilingual home daycare. So when I very unexpectedly moved to Texas to work in Bilingual Education with an almost two-year-old in tow, Mori immediately came to her mind. I set up a meeting at Mori's house within a day or two of moving to Texas, and not only did I find the perfect daycare situation for my son, but I also found a lifelong friend.

Mori and I were born the same year, had sons born the same year, were both Christians, and we were both bilingual moms married to non-bilingual husbands.  She ended up watching my son David while I worked, but then we also hung out together on weekends and occasionally in the evenings, too. We did Bible studies together in her home, walked together, rode bikes together, we both pursued adoptions that didn't go as planned, we sent our boys to pre-school together and then also to a Spanish immersion pre-Kindergarten school. Our boys played T-Ball and soccer together, and then they stayed close as friends for years even though they went to different elementary schools. As young adults, they still have a strong bond that will always be there. 

Mori and her family later completely accepted and embraced our adopted son, Juan David, and treated him like family, too. Juan David has remained very close to her son and still hangs out with him. The friendship between our families will always be strong. 

So Mori and I raised our boys together and watched them grow up together, while we, too, walked beside each other through some high highs and the lowest of lows. She was there through a lot of different seasons of life, but the season I will always remember her through was my season of parenting a child from a toddler to an adult. We may not have been as closely connected through their middle and high school years due to them pursuing different activities and ending up in different circles of friends, but those childhood years kept us close. I'm eternally grateful to God for connecting us and letting us walk together through that precious season of life and for the lifelong bond we share. Getting a chance to meet up over break and share a brunch with her and both of my sons (unplanned!) was a real treat that I don't take for granted.